A Poem: Walking Blind

come real fast

surely make haste

you must know

there’s time to waste

 

form a circle

draw a line

its up to you

what you’ll find

 

the time is now

it always is

must figure out

all of this

 

walking blind

following my bliss

I have comfort though

that it’s all about this

 

moving forward

while being right here

never being

ruled by fear

 

being my best

like only I can

please remember

i still need a hand

A Poem: Truth Down There

I’ve got some questions

I must ask

i hope you will

remove your mask,

dig way down

to the barrel of your soul

dig way down

that’s where I need to go.

The truth is down there

hidden within

the pile of junk

we’ve accumulated along

the years every day

as soon as we start

to dust things off

to clean things up

we’ll fill our cup

the love will flow

like I know it can

out of our hearts

and into our hand.

I use our instead of I

its all about us and

 a big ‘ol we

we’re never alone

I hope you can see

together we can do

find, play and explore.

We just have to dare

and start to bare

 our souls and hearts

with honesty and care.

A Poem: And The She Woke

one day she woke

she couldn’t breathe

she felt so sick

and was touched by the breeze.

 

The breeze turned to wind

as it swallowed her sin

she was standing still

while starting to spin.

 

The spin turned her ’round

shook her upside down – 

a little sideways

until she found…

 

She had been so lost

so off track

all she could think of

was heading back.

 

She’ll never be the same

it’s been a blessing in disguise

she had to fall down

before she could rise.

 

Now she’s found home

and flipped on the light

better than ever

and not having to fight.

 

She agreed with herself

to get up and go

from the valleys to the mountains

for reasons only she knows.

Modern Guilt – Beck

Portland – Gotta Love it!

Ashley and I arrived a couple of days ago and I am absolutely diggin on Portland. The feel here is relaxed, green and seemingly full of love. Had the chance to hit up a couple of venues run by the McMenamin brothers – the Kennedy School (an old elementary school transformed into a pub and entertainment venue including a soaking tub, restaurants & bars featuring their own specialty brews and wines… delightful). Last night walked over to the Bagdad Theater (a short walk from Ash’s new place here in Hawthorne) to watch a Woody Allen film for three bucks while drinking a local IPA and snacking on a tuna sandwich on the balcony of the theater while sitting in a loveseat… awesome idea, chill and unbeatable so far…

Still have a few more days here and will try my best to soak it up… my writing has gotten exponentially more intense and real since I arrived which feels cathartic (misspelled?) and healthy.

Lots of love from Oregon.

Beauty’s got the best of her

Her eyes are bright

her love is right

but she still doesn’t know

 

beauty’s got the best of her

youth is on her side

but secretly she wishes

that she can run and hide

 

its time for her to be set free

to fly around like a honeybee

shes always sweet in her way

but nows the time for her to say…

 

oh set me free!

so I can learn what I need

so I can see who I am

’cause I just want to be me

 

beauty’s got the best of her

youth is in her eye

a heart bursting full of love

all she needs is time

 

oh set me free!

so I can learn what I need

so I can see who I am

’cause I just want to be me

A Love Poem

An incredible sense of love

fills me when I see you

in all your gracious beauty

and your omniscient reign.

You are so natural

so perfect just as you are

nothing else can even compare.

Your light shines so bright

your features so true

lately I’ve come to realize

that its always been you.

I feel a part of you

I think I always have.

You bring peace to my heart

and love to my soul

to be in your presence

I know will never grow old.

To breathe in your air

to caress you with my fingertips

to listen to your whisper

to let you fill me with your spirit

so warm and so true.

I am blessed to experience you

you make me a better person

and I want to thank you

for your timeless love and support.

Taught To Be Proud

Taught to be Proud

Words and Music by Trevor Garrod of Tea Leaf Green

I was taught to be proud of where I come from
And I’m so sad that I’m the only one.
Like a cold preacher boy talking only to himself
How did he think that he got to promised lands?

Sometimes I’m confused and I don’t know where I’m going,
Mistaking gentle rivers for that cold wind a-blowing.
I’m always sure of an angel when she gets here,
But I never see her coming and I miss her when she disappears.

Gone, gone, gone,
Not gone for long,
If you’re taught to be proud of where you come from.

Gone, gone, gone,
Not gone for long,
If you’re taught to be proud of where you come from.

It’s hard to be cool when you’re playing for the prophets;
They really know if you got it or you lost it.
I’ll sing this song but I don’t know where it came from,
Reminds me of a mountainside to stand upon and gently hum.

Sometimes I’m confused
I don’t know where I’m going,
Mistaking gentle rivers for that cold wind a-blowing.
And I’m always sure of an angel when she gets here,
But I never see her coming and I miss her when she disappears.

www.tealeafgreen.com

Back in the USA!

The last couple of weeks have been like a world wind. I have had to come back unexpectedly to the United States after hearing word that my grandmother was in a grave condition. She still isn’t doing well, but is hanging on. I have experienced a lot of culture shock since I arrived back in my own home country. It is hard to describe. When I first realized that I could understand the conversations happening around me on the plane and then sequentially at the airport, it threw me off. It was like all of a sudden I could hear everything again. Like I had been deaf for a long long time and voila! now I could hear.

I spent time back with my family in the Central Valley of California, but it is always an overwhelming experience there and that certainly hasn’t changed. I have dubbed it the land of flowing milk and republicans… shew. That along with a few days of constant family time and I needed to head up to Yosemite, where I have called home during the majority of my adult life. I am still in the loop with my grandmothers health and condition and am much much closer than I was before and I think everyone feels better about it. A part of me feels like I should be back with them visiting my grandmother every day at the home, but it just takes so much out of me and I don’t feel strong enough to support that right now. I am hoping I will have the strength, the internal strength I need soon so I can return and be there for everyone.

My Personal Quest

I really want to know what things are about. I want to know what love is about. I want to know what life is about. I want to know where I fit into the bigger picture. I want to know about spirituality. I want to learn as much as I can about everything that peaks my interest. I want it all.

Can I have it all? I am not sure, but I am sure trying. That is all I can do. I don’t know much about love but I am sure trying to figure it out. I don’t know much about life, but I am sure doing my best to live. I don’t know where I really fit in, but I am trying out different situations to find folks that are more like me than not. I don’t know much about spirituality, but I try to listen to my inner voice as often as I can. I know a little bit about a lot of things so far, but every time something new interests me I try to take the time to learn more than I know now.

I want it all… love, life, happiness, health, light and knowledge. I want to experience everything that I possibly can. I want to know about me in this process. I want to know about others in this process. I want to know. I just don’t know much yet. In fact, sometimes I think I don’t know anything at all. But I do know one thing… I can certainly say that I have been doing my best to find what I am looking for. I just wish sometimes it were easier to know exactly what it is that I am looking for.